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[ it's a matter of time until a nightmare happened. though, he didn't expect it to happen when he came for a nap after today's events, but he's more than wide awake now with a gasping breath and sweat clinging to him.
he has had some here and there, nothing too disorientating that he can just calm himself down. but not this one, he's still out of it, before he will reach for Joonghyuk. ]
he has had some here and there, nothing too disorientating that he can just calm himself down. but not this one, he's still out of it, before he will reach for Joonghyuk. ]
Edited 2022-07-21 02:30 (UTC)
[ I personally would've been impressed if he wasn't awake.
He laughs a little, but it sounds wet, like he's crying or has been. ]
Yeah. ..It's just me, on the train.
[ He pulls his hand back, and sits up a little so he can try and breathe easier. ]
He laughs a little, but it sounds wet, like he's crying or has been. ]
Yeah. ..It's just me, on the train.
[ He pulls his hand back, and sits up a little so he can try and breathe easier. ]
You've never engaged with it.
[ Despite all of them watching him, knowing, and wishing he would talk to them. Joonghyuk knows it's hard so he doesn't give Dokja too much shit for it.
It also can't stop him from feeling the same hurt inflicted on him, from Dokja, in Dimitri. Having to care for people who keep throwing themselves into harm's way... But at least Dokja, he knows.
... he thinks he knows.
That he doesn't want to die. He wants to come back.
... That's what he said on that train, but then his actions— ]
You two deserve to be happy.
[ Despite all of them watching him, knowing, and wishing he would talk to them. Joonghyuk knows it's hard so he doesn't give Dokja too much shit for it.
It also can't stop him from feeling the same hurt inflicted on him, from Dokja, in Dimitri. Having to care for people who keep throwing themselves into harm's way... But at least Dokja, he knows.
... he thinks he knows.
That he doesn't want to die. He wants to come back.
... That's what he said on that train, but then his actions— ]
You two deserve to be happy.
Well yes, but we only have a limited time to make. If I mess up...
[ they lose this first round?
dam. ur anxiety. he shuts up but he has finished the mixing at least. it's just a matter of pouring them into trays and put in the oven.
he is squinting at the monitor again. ]
The rest is just.. gummies and pretzels right? Making the display should be easy.
[ right?? ]
[ they lose this first round?
dam. ur anxiety. he shuts up but he has finished the mixing at least. it's just a matter of pouring them into trays and put in the oven.
he is squinting at the monitor again. ]
The rest is just.. gummies and pretzels right? Making the display should be easy.
[ right?? ]
It's difficult engaging with your trauma. I've had to face plenty of them during the Scenarios.
[ his bully. the trauma of that, of being shoved around.. beaten down. told you're worthless during school when you felt it enough from the family he stayed with.
the trauma of facing his mother again. remembering his childhood, what became of it.
it isn't easy. it's never easy. the fourth wall helped him along but now without it? it's even harder. he never feels strong enough.
even so.. ]
I am, well was... it's a bit hard to be if Biyoo and Mia are at risk.
[ but before this, back home.. it is hard for him to not be happy. even if he has his days where he still feels as if he.. may not deserve it. ]
[ his bully. the trauma of that, of being shoved around.. beaten down. told you're worthless during school when you felt it enough from the family he stayed with.
the trauma of facing his mother again. remembering his childhood, what became of it.
it isn't easy. it's never easy. the fourth wall helped him along but now without it? it's even harder. he never feels strong enough.
even so.. ]
I am, well was... it's a bit hard to be if Biyoo and Mia are at risk.
[ but before this, back home.. it is hard for him to not be happy. even if he has his days where he still feels as if he.. may not deserve it. ]
[ Jin is curled at Joonghyuk's feet, staring up with sad fox eyes. softly chittering as her tails sway anxiously.
Dokja sits down beside him, watching, observing. he has never really shied away from joonghyuk's apparent anger or otherwise. tests it, really. so he doesn't really keep his distance now either. ]
Yoo Joonghyuk.
Dokja sits down beside him, watching, observing. he has never really shied away from joonghyuk's apparent anger or otherwise. tests it, really. so he doesn't really keep his distance now either. ]
Yoo Joonghyuk.
Make sure to put a timer so that the cupcakes don't burn. You have to toothpick them as well to see if they're completely baked.
[ And Dokja does and pops it into the oven!! Nice. In his mind, he is thinking about gummies being skewered by the pretzels. ]
... It shouldn't be difficult if you're good with your hands. Be careful. If it helps, you can carve holes into the gummies already to make it easier.
[ And Dokja does and pops it into the oven!! Nice. In his mind, he is thinking about gummies being skewered by the pretzels. ]
... It shouldn't be difficult if you're good with your hands. Be careful. If it helps, you can carve holes into the gummies already to make it easier.
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